Countdown to shutdown

Let's be honest, I'm not as informed as I could be about the happenings in the country. I read the newspaper every so often, and I glance over the top news on the Yahoo homepage pretty often, but other than that I kinda keep out of the loop. I also could care less about politics. I feel like the whole process is just a bunch of people pushing personal agendas, fighting rather than finding solutions, and a whole lot of unnecessary bother. Yes, that's an over generalization, but to a large extent it's true. Considering my civic involvement--or lack thereof--it should come as no surprise that I heard about the government shutdown the day before it was going to happen. I was surprised that congress has gotten to the point that they would rather shut down everything, other than essential government functions, rather than come to a compromise. No matter which political affiliation you have, this is just ridiculous.

In case you're wondering, a government shutdown doesn't mean everything gets shut down, which is reassuring, but still, shutting down the SBA, passport operations, national parks, the Federal Housing Association, not to mention postponing the payment of all the soldiers is still a big deal. If the government were to shut down 800,000 federal employees would be affected. They would go without pay for however long the shutdown lasted. Some, but not all would be eligible for unemployment benefits, and unless congress approved it, those employees wouldn't receive back pay for the time they weren't working. Ridiculous? I think so.

The shutdown was a result of the fact that congress can't come up with a plan to cut federal spending and lower the national debt. Both parties obviously agree that we need to stop spending so much, but they disagreed on which programs to cut. Republican's wanted to cut back on social welfare programs, and Democrats wanted to limit tax breaks and cut back on some programs for businesses. I don't know much about congress and I definitely don't know much about what it must be like to be a congressman. Who knows, it's probably stressful to have a large amount of people relying on your decisions. But regardless of all that, is a shutdown the most sensible solution for a failure to compromise? Has our two party system divided us so badly that 800,000 people's livelihoods would be compromised for an indefinite amount of time?

Luckily no shutdown was necessary. Late Friday night, just a few hours before the deadline, congress came to an agreement. In 2011 there will be 38 billion dollars worth of cuts made. Had they not made a compromise we would have experienced the first shutdown in fifteen years. Crisis averted, for now. In 2012 they're going to discuss whether or not they'll raise the debt ceiling and then we'll get to go through this all over again.

Fancy feast...or is it?

Pets, we all love them. Unless you're a cat person, in which case you should rethink your life. Just kidding. But seriously. Anyway, we all obviously want the best for our pets and we'd like to give them the best life we can. However, whenever I watch a pet food commercial I feel like the food that's advertised is vastly overrated. Take, for example, this commercial. "Succulent gravy drizzled over filet mignon mixed with vegetables and fortified with vitamins and minerals." or "Rich beef flavor with the delicious taste of corn, carrots, and chicken as well as flax seed to promote heart health." First of all, I made both of those up. But, that's what they all sound like so I'm not making any apologies. Secondly, does giving my dog a gourmet can of dog food really make that big of a difference in his nutrition? Most, if not all, food these days is fortified with vitamins and minerals already, so chances are all those extra things that get added in won't do much. Thirdly, my dog ate anything, besides carrots and Cheetos, so had I given him some classy dog food would he have even noticed? Probably not. And the last point I'd like to make is probably the most important. The commercials make those cans of food look appetizing, especially when they're shown in a crystal bowl being eaten daintily by a pristine looking dog or cat. But at the end of the day that super fancy can of dog food will plop out of the can in the same gross, slimy, smelly way as the normal can that doesn't pretend to be all high and mighty.

We all love our pets, but let's show them we love them by letting them know that their owner is intelligent enough to not fall for a marketing campaign.

BREAKING NEWS: Publisher Limits Shelf Life for E-books at Librar...Oh wait, no one cares.

     I was reading the newspaper yesterday, and considering the state that Japan is in, it's no surprise that at least fifty percent of the A section and bits and pieces of every other section had pieces on some aspect of the disaster as well. I, for one, am really glad there's been so much information available, it's a really big deal and this is gonna be one of those things we tell our kids about.

     There was around half of the A section of the paper that wasn't about Japan. I don't really think that it matters either way, in fact I think it's good that there was information regarding the rest of the world because it is important that we move forward from disasters. The rest of the world doesn't stop moving even if one part does. 

     I was a little confused though why "Publisher Limits Shelf Life for Library E-Books" was on the front page. Really? The front page? Northern Japan is in shambles. Their stock market lost over $620 billion dollars which is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to the state of their economy. And the cherry on top is the threat of a nuclear meltdown, the likes of which we haven't seen since Chernobyl. Putting Japan's issues aside, last time I checked there was still a revolution going on in Libya, congress is continuing their spat over how to cut down the budget, and there are still troops in the middle east. So amidst all this why on earth would they put a story about copyright issues on the front page? On a slow news day, I would probably be upset at the injustice those poor library's are facing, but today, tomorrow, and probably at least the next two weeks, don't count on it.

Looks Like Denim, Feels Like PJ's!

I always told myself that when I turned eighteen I would buy ONE thing from an infomercial on TV. Since I already have a Snuggie©  and I just don't have the space for a Bowflex©, I've just been waiting for the perfect item to purchase from TV. Imagine my excitement when I saw a commercial for Pajama Jeans!

These are just perfect for everyone. For example, do you ever have those mornings when you just want to go to roll out of bed and walk out the door? I have them, frequently. Pretty much every day. When I was younger, in order to speed up my morning, one night I slept in my outfit for the next day. I only did it once because, one, in the morning my clothes looked strangely worse than they did before I went to sleep; secondly, school clothes tend to not be the most comfortable clothes to sleep in. So, considering my lack of motivation to look remotely presentable each morning it's obvious why I would be so thrilled about these.

Imagine the possibilities!

-After a long day are you too tired to change from your normal clothes to your pajamas? Never fear, they're one and the same! In a perfect world you could go for days without switching pants!

-Are you sick of the your jeans leaving indents in your skin? Forget about the fact that your jeans are at lease a size too small, pajama jeans don't even have buttons. They're soft and stretchy so they'll never be too tight. They're so comfortable and breathable that you could exercise in them, yet they fit like real designer jeans. They even have a "butt lifting design". 

-The best part about all this is that a pair of designer jeans costs at least $80 dollars. Lucky for us you can get a pair of pajamas that pretend to be jeans for $40! 


So, all jokes aside, at the end of the day these "pants" are ridiculous. I just want to point out that $40 (plus shipping and handling) is enough for some fun "pajamas" from Victoria's Secret. If I were going to sleep in $40 anything I would definitely pick something other than pajama jeans.


So consider carefully, but if you decide that these actually are for you, the toll free number is 1-800-785-4988. Who knows, maybe these will turn into a sensation like the Snuggie. 




Let's hope not.

Lady Gag-Gag

Who in their right mind comes to the Grammys encased in an egg? Lady Gaga obviously, and the state of her mind is up for debate. We should have seen it coming though. How could you top coming to the VMA's in a real. live. meat dress? Apparently this was her way of one-upping herself.

So between the absurd outfits, her "music", pretty much everything about her, I find myself asking, why isn't the whole world sick of Lady Gaga?

Why are people so impressed with a lady who only wears stripper outfits or weird dresses. Why did her concert tour do so well, but she can't sing at ALL. Even on her album when they can make her sound good, her lyrics are weird.

I don't think I'm the only one who hopes this obsession with Lady Gaga ends soon. Really soon.

P.S. Her new single, Born This Way, which has been #1 on iTunes for the past four days sounds exactly like Express Yourself by Madonna. Just sayin'.

WWJD- What would Jimmer do?

Jimmer (if you want to know more about him read this). He is the poster child of BYU athletics. Every student and faculty member loves him, as does most every resident of Utah county at the very least. I'd go as far as to say that even a handful of UofU students are closet Jimmer fans. Even those who happen to go to BYU and don't worship Jimmer have never dared to voice their dissent out loud.

Until now.

Michelle Peralta finally couldn't handle the burden of hearing Jimmer's name everywhere she went. This prompted her to shoot a letter the the editor of the Daily Universe expressing her distaste. This is what she wrote.

Idol Worship

I can’t walk across campus without hearing Jimmer Fredette’s name a dozen times. His name comes up everywhere: in class, at work, during lunch … really, people? Cut it out with the Jimmer worship. Last time I checked, idol worship was very much frowned upon in the scriptures.

Don’t you have a life to live? Then quit wasting it in front of the TV or in lines at the Marriott Center.

At the very least, stop trying to convert those of us who don’t follow BYU sports and don’t care that baseball and badminton are two different things. Pushing basketball on us isn’t going to make us like it any better.

I’m not blaming Jimmer for all this; was it Nephi’s fault in the Book of Mormon when his brothers worshiped him? As far as I’m concerned, Jimmer is perfectly free to live his dreams. If he reaches his goals and lives his dreams, more power to him. I would like the same courtesy from his fans: let me live my own dreams in peace, even if they don’t include ever sitting in the Marriott Center screaming my brains out.

Before I say anything, can I just point out that, last time I checked, Nephi's brothers didn't worship him. I may have slept through the year we covered the Book of Mormon in seminary, but I do know that things didn't go down that way.

I can't blame Michelle for writing a letter to the editor voicing her distaste for something. That's the purpose of having the option to write to your newspaper. However, I would like to ask though, what was she expecting to happen after it got published? The fervor people have for Jimmer is inextinguishable and if he is threatened in any way BYU kids will fight for him to the death.

Death wasn't required this time though. All it took was the internet--more specifically, Facebook. Within hours people started looking her up on her conveniently public profile. Within nine more hours there were hundreds of comments defending Jimmer's honor. This thread of comments garnered the attention of ESPN. Also within nine hours Michelle Peralta took her profile from public to 100% private. You can't even send her an email. The only thing you can do is send a friend request. Chances are she won't need to worry about that though. The odds are a lot higher that she'll be losing friends after this.

Luckily someone got a copy of the massive amount of comments that were posted before they were covered up. I spent a large chunk of my afternoon reading them. Some are dumb, a few are mean, many are extremely witty, the majority are sacriligeous. I am very proud of the BYU population for coming up with them.

So on behalf of Provo, UT--the crazy place that it is--I'd just like to say: Michelle Peralta, you've been Jimmered.

We R Who We R...I guess

What do T-Pain, Owl City, the Bed Intruder Song, Rihanna, and Auto-tune the News have in common?

-Auto-tune obviously.

T-Pain is mildly annoying, Owl City is overplayed, and Rihanna is more overplayed than Owl City. Auto-tune the News and the Bed Intruder Song are both hilarious. So obviously it's doesn't have to be a given that anything with auto-tune will be 100% awful. But sometimes there are songs with auto-tune that are completely disastrous. As are the people who sing said songs.

There is one person who not only utilizes but relies solely on auto-tune. This person's name is Kesha. I know it's really supposed to be Ke$ha but I think that's stupid, so Kesha it is. The worst part about it is that her songs are insanely catchy and a lot of people (me included) probably sing along wen no one is around. You could call it a guilty pleasure. But as with most guilty pleasures you wish they didn't exist because you would be fine-if not better off-without them. The reasons I hate Kesha are probably limitless but I'll narrow it down to three. Most are on her physical appearance which might seem petty, but since I don't personally know her it's all I can comment on.

1. Her choice of wardrobe is always ridiculous. She has described her style as Pirate-Chic, but I feel a little differently about it.

If she means pirate in the been-on-the-high-seas-for-months-at-a-time-without-a-brush-or-shower sense then I can see where she's coming from. But then where did "chic" part come from? Just sayin'. (and yes that 'dress' is made of a garbage bag. No joke.)

2. While hair and makeup might fall under the wardrobe category I chose to give it a separate bullet point. On the red carpet Kesha has said she generally does her own hair and makeup. While it's perfectly reasonable to not want to fit into the Hollywood definition of beautiful, don't you actually want to look...beautiful? Even if it's in your own way. I feel like sequined eyebrows, massive amounts of eyeliner, silver lipstick, ratty fohawks, and glitter EVERYWHERE doesn't really show off your beauty. Maybe she could pull off one of those at a time (even the fohawk if it looked less gross). But all at once it makes her look like...a drag queen. Is that mean to say?

3. While it's impossible to keep your foot from tapping while one of her songs is playing, once you've heard it five million times on the radio you realize that 1. She doesn't sing, 2. the lyrics are any combination of weird, trashy, gross, and/or stupid. Who wants to date someone who looks like Mick Jagger anyway? 3. She doesn't sing. I realize that's been mentioned twice. But that's how much of an issue it is for me.

I realize I shouldn't bash on her so much. And I should probably find positive things to say about people. So I will say this-I've never seen a garbage bag made into a dress. Kudos for being resourceful.