The Munchies

You know those days when you wander around your kitchen, opening every cupboard and every drawer trying to find something that sounds appetizing? Every once in a while something delicious is discovered in round one, however, more often than not you don't get that lucky. Usually you get stuck in a vicious cycle that goes a little like this: fridge, cupboard, pantry, fridge, go sit on the couch/sit in your room/fix your hair/etc. Wait five minutes. Repeat.

Sometimes you'll eventually find something and sometimes you'll have to wait until dinner or make a quick Wendy's run. But, every so often, after pacing the kitchen from anywhere between 5-30 minutes you'll finally remember that thing that once it's in your mind you don't stop craving it. For some it's something normal like a sandwich or cereal. For others it could be something a little less orthodox. Such as, I don't know, peas? Crazy, I know. I'm not proud of it, but suddenly this school year I have developed this weird love of those little green balls. The weird thing is that peas aren't even a vegetable that most people like. For example, everyone loves carrots, and celery, and potatoes, but the fans of peas are few and far between. I don't understand it, but for some reason on the days when I am moseying around my kitchen like a fat kid on a race track I end up craving those and nothing else.

Someone help me. I can't have the full college experience if I'm wanting vegetables (much less that vegetable) instead of pizza, diet Coke, or Twinkies.

Autumn

Utah is the most awful place on earth. One, It is cold-ish for 6-7 months out of the year, Two,... that's actually the only complaint I have. I love living here in the summer, but any time the temperature drops below fifty-fife degrees I wonder why anyone would voluntarily live here between November and May. But today I experienced an unusual moment when I was actually glad I'm here in the middle of November.

I was walking home from a friend's apartment this afternoon. This friend lives at the Branbury where there are lots and lots of trees. I was walking home with my hands deep in my pockets, hood up, and headphones in with the wind continually trying to push me off the sidewalk and rather than being miserable and angry at the current climate like I am every other cold day, I could only marvel at the brilliant colors of the orange, yellow and red trees with a bright blue sky behind them. I felt like a seven year old as I dragged my shoes through the build up of leaves in the gutters and it was all I could do to not pick up a big pile of leaves and toss them in the air. For those brief fifteen minutes I was 100 percent happy. Not even the sporadic flurries of snow could dampen my mood.

When I got to my own apartment which has 10 trees at the most and at least 60 percent of them are pine trees--which by the way only shed brown pine needles everywhere--my euphoria started to wear off, but I was glad I had a brief escape from from the dull gray existence which we Utahns call winter.

Disconnect

Utah Valley University is not the college of choice for most young adults in Utah. However there are a few positives of going to the state cop-out school.

1. The chicken fingers in the cafeteria are life changing

2. Almost every building is connected therefore you hardly ever have to go outside if the weather is undesirable.

One of the negatives of UVU is the fact that some of the buildings aren't connected to the main campus. And by not connected I mean pack your wagon and saddle up the horse, it'll take a couple days to get there. With some buildings it doesn't matter that they're so far away. The McKay Education Building for example (A)--A very small percentage of UVU students actually go to that building so it's no big deal that it's way across campus. The problem arises when a building that is pivotal to a student's success is .58 miles away from the center of campus (B) (For the record that is not an exaggeration. I Googled it). The building I refer to is none other than the testing center (C).

Sometimes the hike is marginally OK. On the days when the leaves are beautiful, the temperature is perfect, and the sun is shining but not so brightly that it blinds you. This blissful period of time is a 3-8 day block that can occur any time between mid of September to the end of November (welcome to Utah). Any other time the weather is either so hot you're sweating bullets or so cold and windy your nose starts running the second you step outside.

I had a particularly amazing experience on my way to the testing center today. It was pouring rain AND bitter cold. Oh, and my headphones were broken. How did I get so lucky? By the time I got back to school my hair was windblown, wet and tangled, my shoes were soaked through and my pants were wet up to mid-calf even after I painstakingly avoided all puddles.

I do try to find the positives in life though so two nice things about today? I wore waterproof mascara so my make up still looked alright when I got back to school, and my backpack shielded my back from the pouring rain. It's all about the silver lining right?... right?...

Product Placement

I know that reality shows aren't cheap. There are competitions, guest stars, lodging, food, bonus prizes, and hosts to be paid for. Not to mention $250,000 dollars has to come from somewhere right? But, if a large television network has multiple shows giving out that much money (or more) per season, you'd think that they would have enough money to hire better advertising specialists.

Tuesday night is Biggest Loser night. Always. Two hours of watching morbidly obese people getting their butts kicked. It makes me feel better about my exercise habits. While I love the show, it is THE single worst show at product placement that has ever been shown on television. It doesn't even attempt subtlety. The most frequent product is Subway by far.

The contestants will take a hike down to the nearest town. By the end of their strenuous adventure they will be starving and exhausted. As they stumble into town one of the trainers (usually it's Bob) will say, "Hey guys look at this! There's a Subway right down the block!" The next few minutes of the show will contain the name Subway at least 3 dozen times. This is a small portion of the conversation that goes on at Subway:

Bob: "Hey guys we're so lucky we found a Subway. At Subway you can get a delicious, heart healthy, filling, and did I mention delicious Subway sandwich. They even have breakfast at Subway. Subway's breakfast egg-white sandwiches are the perfect start to your day. Don't you love Subway?"

Contestant 1: "Bob, I am so glad you brought us to Subway. My Subway fresh fit sandwich is so great! I'm so glad that Subway offers healthy, delicious, affordable food!"

Contestant 2: Hey Contestant One! It looks like you have the Subway fresh fit black forest ham sandwich. It looks almost as good as my Subway breakfast egg white on an english muffin. Ha ha ha.

(If there's playful (scripted) banter in the conversation of course it looks more natural right?)

Bob: Alright guys, enough talk, we can't stay at Subway forever! Finish your Subway sandwich and then you guys get to run ten miles back to the ranch. I've already spoiled you too much with all this Subway.

By the end you are definitely craving Subway, which obviously is the point, and you feel ridiculous for even letting the thought cross your mind.

This scenario is played out with at least three other products throughout the episode. Yoplait yogurt, Subway, Ziploc, Extra gum, Brita filters, Biggest Loser protein powder and Luna bars are the products featured most frequently although there are definitely more. Not to mention, every commercial break will advertise for the same things again.

I really am OK with product placement to an extent. It is smart advertising to see a product in a real setting, but does it really have to be so blatant? Can't the producers work things in a little more naturally?

Headline: Local grocery store doing their part to help customers during the recession.

You know the days when you look through your fridge, pantry and cupboards and there's nothing you want to eat so you tell your mom, "Mom! you need to go shopping there's nothing to eat!" And then she goes off on you saying how the pioneers and the pilgrims had to eat weeds and rodents and I should be grateful that I have a fridge full of ketchup, salad dressing, and hot sauce.

What, that doesn't happen to anyone else? Dang.

Anyway, that was not the situation with me. I literally had nothing to eat in my entire apartment. Other than inedible things like baking powder, brownie mix, and vegetable oil, I had maybe a single tortilla and some peanut butter.

It should come as no surprise that my grocery bill was obscene. Imagine my excitement when my cashier handed me this:

Wow, what a steal. I can save 50 whole cents on my groceries next week! Let's get real. It would make sense if the promotion was get 50 cents off every $5 or even $10 you spend, but 50 cents off $50 is only 1%. Really?

It's talent week at the Glenwood!

So far life in my apartment has been great. There are a few downsides (the top drawer in the bathroom falls out if you open it too far, the kitchen table and chairs are wobbly, and our hallway slopes), but the positives far outweigh the negatives. There is one weird thing that I can't quite decide if it's a bad thing or a good thing though
Starting Sunday night Natalie (my roommate) and I kept hearing different things coming from another apartment near our bedroom. This is how it went down.

Sunday: Harp music
Monday: Guitar
Tuesday: Singing
Wednesday: Singing AND Guitar
Thursday: This one was the weirdest. We couldn't decide if it was open mic poetry night or someone reciting Shakespeare. Either way someone would speak dramatically, and then people would clap afterward.

Since then we haven't heard things as consistently as we did the first week. Sometimes I still get to go to sleep to harp music though, which is nice. My only question is who on earth brings a harp to college?

Here's your change sir.

It's been almost two weeks since school started. College is so completely different from high school. One of my favorite differences is that there are so many things and people to watch. Sometimes weird, sometimes hilarious. This happened today:
A guy was at the vending machine getting a soda right next to the table where I was reading. He paid with a $10. He got his soda and waited for his change. All of a sudden the vending machine started spitting out nickels. The fact that he got roughly $8 in quarters is funny by itself. But the best part was that instead of pouring the change into the compartment at the bottom of the machine the coins came flying out of it and landing on the ground all around the vending machine. It was all I could do to not laugh out loud. Either way, it completely made my day.

Exhausting!

If you’re under the age of twelve and your parents are crazy enough to let you go on an airplane by yourself you are granted the luxury of a chaperone. They usher you through security, get you to the right gate, sit next to you during the flight, and deposit you into the hands of your guardian waiting outside the gate. If you’re lucky enough you even get a neat airline pin that in reality is to classify you as child traveling alone, but in your eyes it’s a symbol of status.
Fast forward a few years. Most of the teenage population is just as inept as a twelve year old at navigating the airport, yet they don’t get babysitters. Sure being eighteen years old I don’t think I would like being watched by someone I don’t know, but I need as much help as I can get to get through the airport.
First, you print your tickets at a handy touch screen kiosk, not. If your parents pity your ineptitude enough they’ll make your reservations for you. It makes things easier, but once you get the the airport it may or may not turn out that you don’t have the information the kiosk wants. Wait in line, talk to the baggage check woman who is nice enough, but wants your information quicker than you can physically give it. But then you have a ticket and everything is fine. “Well, that wasn’t nearly as bad as I expected” you think to yourself. “All that’s left to get through is security” which everyone knows is a nightmare.
Everyone knows, that in theory that security is expected to be a very tedious and VERY long process of waiting in line, emptying your bag of electronics and metal, taking off your shoes, getting prodded by a metal detecting stick, and after you’ve done all that trying to get all your things together while other people’s cartons full of electronics, shoes, and bags keep piling on top of yours. Everything about that process is true, except for one. Getting through security is a whirlwind. Imagine that whole list in fast forward. Efficiency is fantastic don‘t get me wrong, but if I hadn‘t had flip flops, the extra step of tying my shoes may have caused me to have a break down.
Comparatively the process of getting on the plane is relatively simple, almost relaxing. Once you’re past all the metal detectors the rest of the airport seems quiet and calm. You plop down on a chair with metal arm rests (in my opinion the dumbest idea ever, especially during a long lay over), partake of the free wi-fi and spend the next hour watching you tube or Hulu, writing a blog, or checking the news feed on Facebook. The boarding call is made over the intercom and you shuffle into the line, walk onto the plane and enjoy the next few hours of your life reading sky mall and looking at cloud formations that are so close it feels like you can touch them. The plane touches down and you walk out of the airport ready to enjoy that well deserved vacation. Enjoy it, because five days from now you get to go through that wonderful process all over again.